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Fight of the minute

War! Let slip the cats of war. There’s a Harpy war going on people. A war between the vast and powerful Nybble Collective....and those other guys. You
know, the ones that can’t come up with interesting or even scathing rumors? I
wasn’t sure if this actually the case at first, of course. Perhaps what I had been
hearing about their ineffectualness was simply me projecting on them. (Get it?
No? Oh well.) So I decided, in my infinite wisdom, to test that hypothesis out.
I decided to pass on a little ‘rumor’ to them. All true, mind you. that chick
Danife really claimed to have never heard of Harpies, but that’s beside the point.
In my infinite Maxness, I let the ‘harpies’ know exactly how irrelevant they are
by telling them people didn’t even know who or what they were. (Incidentally
and conveniently leaving out the fact she had never heard of the Nybble Report
either, but that’s besides the point). I even told them to, and I quote: “Suck it”
So what do they come up with as far a ‘scathing’ rumor? “Maybe danife just said
that to get into Max’s pants.”
Oooooh “buuuurn”
I think I need to start selling arms to the enemy if this Harpy war is to actually get interesting, because right now, it’s like a game of Civ, fucking tanks
against spearmen. Or something like that. Come on people, put some effort in.

Btw, you boys and girls kept up to date with that little ‘spat’ between me and
one of these so called harpies? Yeah, Imogen Heap, I mean the Albino. So she
dared me to slap her, essentially. Probably thought that getting me banned from
Elysium would look great on her Harpy resume. Little did she realize that I’d get
myself unbanned from *all* Elysia in less than a few hours after getting banned,
resulting in her, and the acolyte that runs the Symposium to have egg on their
face. Slap, parry, Slap, parry, boom, you got served. And that’s how you play the
games boys and girls. And this is why you don’t fuck with the crazy ones.

Don’t worry if you don’t understand the above, you’re too dumb to live. Then
someone decided to kill you, and bring you back from the death. Because apparantly they were too dumb to realize that turning someone too dumb to live
into a vampire was a bloody bad idea. Hah! Don’t they look stupid now. Or not.
What it boils down to, and this goes out to you ‘harpies’, is this:
You suck. That seems to be about the level of wit we can expect from your future ‘rumors’. So I figure, speak in terms you guys can understand, right? Right.

Halp, I have an Elysium and I
must (s)cream
Samantha Montgomery, of Symposium fame (What,? Oh...right....kind of
clashes with the article here, doesn’t it?) Correction; of Symposium ‘fame’. Wait,
where was I. Oh right, So Samantha has proposed (and got it passed) a new
law to the Senate, namely this: To have Congress (that’s court for most of us),
rotate its location each month so that it’s held at every Elysium at some point.
Some people suggest this might be because she has such a hard time attracting
non-crones to her little bastion that she wants the government to mandate our
attendance. I like that interpretation, but here’s another one for you:
We all know the bunker, where we usually hold Congress...is locked down tighter than Fort Knox when a Goldman-Sachs convention rolls into town. Let’s face
it, even the Pinnacle, which has pretty beefy security, doesn’t come close. The
Symposium of course, is a distant third in terms of security. So why, being the
paranoid and dangerous predators that we are, would anyone be interested in
hosting a massive meeting of predatorial minds in a venue that isn’t as secure as
the usual haunt? I’ll tell you why. Cause they’re terrorists who plan to blow the
place up with all of us inside? I’m not saying that that’s what Samantha Montgomery has planned......I’m just saying. Either way, terrorist or not, there’s no
doubt that this lessens the security for ALL of us when we visit congress. That
means each of you assholes has to be that much more vigilant. Cause really, do
YOU want to be locked up in a room with dozens of other predators whilst the
*Acolytes* provide security? No offense witches and warlocks, you have your
uses and your place, but running security ain’t it.

dumb
u, in case u
o
y
to
it
sh
explain
g this....
ax is here, to cause I can’t keep doin
M
r,
a
fe
o
n
Have
ugh be
e dumb tho
b
’t
n
o
d
e
s
a
ple

Exclusivee
l
c
a
n
in
P
n
o
nds up
rag is for
Nybble expou
ip
s
s
o
g
e
tl
it
l
..this
e. Why?
iv
s
u
l
ness: So yes.
c
x
e
e
l
c
a
g, a Pinn
me posting
t
h
the time bein
g
u
o
th
ts
some idio
ites was a
s
b
Apparantly
e
w
e
iv
s
u
l
c
ony-Ex
Kored
l
o
r
a
e
y
it on Cacaph
2
1
threat. No,
ces, you
a
l
p
e
s
Masquerade
o
th
to
t wander in
ical, they
p
ty
ans don’t jus
’s
it
e
s
o
p
es. I sup
ey want to
th
damn luddit
e
ik
l
t
s
u
j
me up,
So I made
want to shut
.
p
u
k
c
e
b
n
d glen
ne of you can
shut palin an
o
n
w
o
n
,
y
it
clusiv
upon shit
g
in
l
a deal for ex
b
m
tu
s
s
ut mortal
with. I mean
in
complain abo
g
e
b
to
e
f
erade sa
ilight-Obw
T
that’s masqu
a
e
b
to
e
u’d hav
like this
g
a
m
seriously, yo
a
k
in
phrenic to th
out there.
sessed schizo
s
e
ir
p
m
a
v
e
al-lif
is proof of re

An Interview with a cat
Nybble: Let us begin, you and I, or rather you, by giving us your name, affiliation, and general stance in unlife. All that good shit.
Battista: Very Well.. I am Lord-Meister Iago Battista, childe of the Right Honorable Marquise, Meister of the Battista school of Au Pairs, Master of Elysium,
Administrator of Coronado Island, Incubus of the Unconquered. And I should
say I am doing very well.
Nybble: “Tell us about your Sire. She’s the head of the Invictus, right? Does she
hate us? Does she just hate me? She’s the queen bee of these so called harpies
right? So why are you consenting to being interviewed by me? The enemy so
to speak?”
Battista: You are hardly the enemy Mister Kaufmann. We are all kindred, we
all are citizens of the City of San Diego. I dont draw my lines at covenant..i
draw them at people, where things count the most. My Sire? The Marquise is a
leader of the Invictus yes, no she does not hate us, I dont even think she hates
you despite your best efforts. I think she might even find you a tad amusing. I
am not entirely sure what this harpy murder is all about. Its not something I
am entirely familiar with.... let just say I am little old school when it comes to
the harpy business. I imagine if there would be a leader amongst that group it
would be her. She certainly is more qualified than the others of course.
Nybble: Naturally. So you’re the administrator of the Pinnacle. What’s that like,
and what can we expect from the place up in the sky in the future?
Battista: Its busy. We get a lot of new blood in town and many of them havent
learned how to behave properly in company...so there is a lot security involved
to make sure things stay safe and comfortable for all. Its rewarding though to
see kinded come together and do business or socialize and to know that your
hard work makes that possible. The Future? Well I plan on updating the information systems in the Elysium and I think i might expand the ghoul amenities
as I am starting to see a growth of Kindred bringing their pets to the Pinnacle.
As for as upcomming events... The Pinnacle will be hosting the Monthly Congress soon and we have a few social functions, clan meetings, and parties on
the schedule as well. Valentines Day... keep an ear out.
Nybble: “I don’t go in for valentine’s day. It’s just a commercial hoax perpetrated by big pharma to convince us love is chemical so they can sell love potions. Anyway. It does seem like yours is the more ecletic Elysium. Aren’t you
worried by hobos like me and others coming in and ruining the ambiance?”
Battista: There is the symposium I suppose...god bless that place. If that place
burns down I will personally build them a new one.
Nybble: So are you going to throw us hobo’s out?
Battista: No of course not. That would be rude.

Nybble: Oh good. I was worried for a second there, I like mini-golfclubs and
all, but how many windmills can you shoot your balls through before you get
bored right? So the Invictus. You guys haven’t had it easy, have you? Or well, I
mean, you have, in the sense that you’re all rich and shit, but all this Carthian
being on top stuff must have you guys chuffed, right? When can we expect the
Invictus revolution?
Battista: We aren’t much into Revolutions, Mister Kaufmann. At the end of the
Day the Invictus are just as invested in the success of this city as the Carthians
or any other covenant. Our dedication to the masquerade and the traditions i
think are testament to that fact. We have worked hand in hand with Carthians,
Crones, Dragons, and Lancea on numerous occasions. We and the carthians
share similar goals, we want a better life for the kindred of this city, we want
a safe city from external and internal threats, we want order and civility in a
world that has very little, the difference though is we have differeing ideas on
how to achieve those goals, I just happen to think that the Unconquereds are
better.
Nybble: Come on...you don’t have to lie to us. Maybe I just see conspiracies
everywhere like your Sire claims I do, but is anyone really dumb enough to
believe the Invictus wouldn’t murder us all in our sleep if given the chance?
Battista: Come now Mister Kaufmann...why would we wait till you were
asleep?
Nybble: Cause I have a gun and I know how to use it better than you do?
Battista: I’ll keep that in mind when we come for you Mister Kaufmann.
Nybble: Word. So is there anything or anyone you want to mention? Say a few
scathing words about, express your undying love ie; blood bond to, maybe declare a vendetta on someone? Now’s your chance.
Battista: I suppose I would like to say thank you to Grandmother Maria, she
is a shining example to Crones everywhere. I would also like to say that there
will be a Clan Daeva meeting coming up soon and that I appreciate Samantha
Montgomeries offer to be my understudy but I have to respectfully decline.
And last but not least..do show up to congress this sunday. Its going to be a
real... blast.
Nybble: That’s interesting. The blast bit I mean. Are you saying there will be
explosives? Cause with all these rumors about terrorists, I don’t know if it’s
appropiate to make comments like that. Oh wait, am I confusing mortal and
kindred society again?
Battista: Probably.
Nybble: You’re probably planting explosives? What?
Battista: NO (he emphasized this word. A bit defense don’t you think? -ed)
Mister Kaufmann... just come to congress it will be interesting.
Nybble: Ugh, fine. If I must. Thanks for the Interview though!

Rex-Mex Fujitsu Kensington
Oh, snap. Rex-Mex got himself an urn in the ground. So who did it? Wasn’t us.
Wasn’t the Invictus. Wasn’t the Dragons. Wasn’t the Sanctified. So guess who?
Yep, they handled it ‘internally’ alright. That’s pretty bad huh? Apparantly it’s
okay for them to go and kill people without a fair trial and all that jazz.
Now granted. Rex-Mex was a walking breach and I nearly shot himself. But
you’d think he’d at least have gotten a fair shake at a trial where the ohmgywhatkindoffuckingfreakareyou!? could say his piece and defend his ass. But
hey, maybe we can give the Acolyte that ashed him one of those fair trials,
right? Or maybe they’ll handle that ‘internally’ too.
They should take some lessons from Kensington, of the Movement. She gets
into trouble a lot it seems. Or maybe not a lot, just with the wrong people. But
she takes care of that shit. Apparantly she was patient zero. Or at least that’s
what the Invictus says. They also say she got into a whole bunch of shit with
the Prince of LA (him and me go way back. Well, not really, but I’m sure he
remembers my face), and in order to get herself forgiven or whatever, she led
a taskforce south across the border, against Tijuana, to get the real deal. That
stuff ’s boring. So yeah the sheriff did the real thing, whatever. That’s not what
we care about. What we care about, why was Alice Fujitsu, of the Invictus, on
that taskforce? And why are my Invictus contacts (who may or may not include
Fujitsu) giving me all this info on Kensington and her personal problems with
the Prince of LA? It makes you think, doesn’t it?
Speaking of Fujitsu. She used to be named Alice Black. So now it’s Fujitsu. Or
was it Fujita? Which just so happens to be the name of another Invictus, some
Japanese chick named Mary Fujita. Who incidentally, I haven’t seen in quite a
while. Where is she? Does this mean that Alice Black diablerized her and took
on parts of her personality, including her name either as an attempt to get in
touch with the new soul within herself out of guilt, or perhaps as mockery? Is
that possible? I’m not saying she did. I’m just asking if it’s possible.

ou must!
Y
!
te
u
ib
tr
n
o
Through broken walls, you too
ou too can c
y
,
r
e
b
h forget it,
m
o
e
,
m
d
e
e
r
R
d
in
may hear the shout of a trillion
K
duty of all
e! But it’s
in
suns exploding all at once in the For it is the
m
n
e
v
e
’t
n
ty. It is
eyes of a child infected with
nal nights at
r
isn’t your du
te
it
e
e
th
s
e
s
s
pa
porphyria. There is no other way
uld care
o
h
s
un right? It
e
w
t
a
th
for us to be what we are, alone in still f
t’s really all
. But hey,
g
the night, forever and ever and in least and tha
n
o
r
w
m

I
l. Maybe
perpetual darkness and muck, we
e and I still
m
bout after al
ti
a
e
th
l
l
a
shall have each other nonetheless,
get told
ontribute!
C
.
u
o
that’s what I
y
d
l
u
o
h
do. So s
, follow
)
d
e
h
c
a
Don’t unchain me. Don’t unchain
tt
a
do the shit I
s
s
e
Email (addr
n
yourself little white rat. You’ll be in
a
e
m
d
n
e
twitter.com/
.
S
w
w
w
/
/
:
p
tt
the limelight within the eternal
eed. (h
be excellent to
my Twitter f
t
s
u
j
darkness. Shining like Shangri-La.
y
l
l
a
r
e
n
d ge
nybbleth) An
Nybble
One love, one peace. Nybble out.
each other! -


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