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Travel Agents Sketch .pdf


Original filename: Travel Agents Sketch.pdf
Title: Travel Agents Sketch
Author: Jamie Hornsey

This PDF 1.3 document has been generated by Pages / Mac OS X 10.6.6 Quartz PDFContext, and has been sent on pdf-archive.com on 31/01/2011 at 17:14, from IP address 86.28.x.x. The current document download page has been viewed 1648 times.
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© 2011 Jamie Hornsey

Travel Agents
INT: Travel Agent
A middle aged couple, MARVIN and MARGARET, walk into a Travel Agents,
sitting at the desk is a 60 year old man, STEPHEN, who has a
intensely smiling look on his face.
MARVIN and MARGARET sit down
STEPHEN
Hello! Welcome to SunnySide Travel Agents, specializing in holidays
in Cornwall and Devon, how can I help you?
MARVIN
Well, we are looking to book a holiday
STEPHEN
Yes?
MARGARET
Yes we’re looking to book a holiday
MARVIN [retorting]
Yes?! I just said that...
MARGARET
Shut up MARVIN, it’s this again isn’t it?
MARVIN
Isn’t what?
MARGARET
It’s just all my fault that your mother cut us out of her will isn’t
it?!
MARVIN
Look, theres people around here and we’re not getting anywhere by
arguing!
MARGARET covers her ears and screams
STEPHEN
OK, lets continue

© 2011 Jamie Hornsey

MARVIN
Yes we were looking to book a holiday
STEPHEN
Anywhere you would particularly like to go?
MARVIN
Well nowhere in particular but theres one problemMARGARET
[Stops screaming] I hate Foreigners
MARVIN
She hates foreigners
MARGARET
Yep, just can’t stand them
STEPHEN
Well I do think I know some place where you can go
MARGARET and MARVIN
Where?
STEPHEN
Spain
MARVIN
What do you mean bloody Spain, it’s full of the Spanish isn’t it?!
MARGARET
Yeah, goddamn Spanishers
STEPHEN
Nope, theres no Spanish people in Spain, it’s all Englishmen who just
moved on over
MARGARET
I also like the Beach, is it near the Beach?

© 2011 Jamie Hornsey

STEPHEN
Sorry, it’s mainland Spain
MARVIN
But that is rather boring, all we’ll be doing is Get up, Pool. Get
up, Pool. Get up, Pool. Get up STEPHEN
Well, you could always play Snooker, they have it on site
MARGARET
No, we can’t go there
MARVIN
We bloody well are, I love Snooker. When can you get us the flights?
STEPHEN
Well theres some great flights here... BMI Baby... Row E
MARVIN
We’ll take them!
STEPHEN
Good, If I could just get your card
MARGARET
Wait, I want to ask something! What time do they leave?
STEPHEN
[Looks at screen] 5 Minutes
MARVIN
5 Minutes?! I can’t get on a plane in 5 minutes!
MARGARET
Yeah, what else have you got?
STEPHEN
Well, I’ve got RyanAir in the wing seats for next month

© 2011 Jamie Hornsey

MARVIN
Hold on, wing seats?
STEPHEN
It just means you sit a bit closer to the side than usual
MARGARET
How close?
STEPHEN
[Coughs] On the wing
MARGARET
Sorry?
STEPHEN
ON THE WING
MARVIN
We can’t have that then!
STEPHEN
But it’s a great view
MARGARET
Great view?! I don’t care! We’re not flying on that!
STEPHEN
Fine fine, ooh, heres something! British Airways, only £100 each!
MARVIN
Great, we’ll take it
STEPHEN
Hold on, they’re on strike until 2012
MARVIN
Ah

© 2011 Jamie Hornsey

[Phone Rings]
STEPHEN
I’ll just get that
[Picks up phone]
Hello?
Uh huh
Yeah
OK
That’s fine then
Bye!
[Puts down phone]
MARVIN
What was it?
STEPHEN
Well, it’s good news!
MARGARET
What?
STEPHEN
It appears the BMI Baby flights have been delayed until next week,
still want them?
MARVIN
Sure
[MARVIN and MARGARET pay and walk out]
STEPHEN
Have a nice holiday!
Two new customers, a couple, walk in
MAN
Well, my wife wants somewhere she can relax completely with no
distractions from phones and the like

© 2011 Jamie Hornsey

WOMAN
Yeah I do
STEPHEN
Well we’ve got great deals on Egypt right now, would you like to
discuss
[They begin talking]
END


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