ChroniclesofaCrazyCatLady .pdf

Chronicles of a

And now I wear these scars with
pride,
no matter, for you see:
ticks and fleas I shan’t abide–
sharp though your claws may be!

Crazy Cat Lady:

How could I possibly have known
when first I saw you on Kijiji,
that I would very soon bemoan
those lethal words: “Free Kitty!”

As I had hoped, your trust soon
grew–
you no longer feared my tread,
and to my delight, cuddles ensued–
“I love you, my kitties, truly!” I said.

Your eyes they called me hither–
such fluff I can’t resist;
“I’ll take Mummy AND her litter!”
I did foolishly insist.

Kittens, well fed on mother’s milk
soon took to scaling upholstery–
never mind be it leather or silk,
you cost my couch most dearly!

And so the lot of you arrived,
disheveled and flea-bitten,
de-worming was prescribed–
Oh, but I was smitten!
In my linen closet you chose to bed,
hissing at my approach–
“Sweet kitty mummy,” I said,
“I wouldn’t dare encroach!”

Furniture was not all they destroyed:
paperbacks, drapes, houseplants–
in particular it seemed they enjoyed
scaling the legs of my pants! Then,
spring, it sprung!

The fleas began to spread,
still I did not complain,
although as I lay abed,
the itch drove me insane!

My how mummy carried on
Her heat-cycle had begun–
behold the whore of Babylon!
But you see I ain’t complaining,
there’s nothing I would change–
love’s a risk worth taking,
even with tapeworm and mange!

I bore it ‘till I could bear it no more,
and decided the time had come–
those kitties hadn’t a clue what was
in store…
Bath-time for everyone!

I adore my little rascals,
shenanigans and all,
you’re absolutely worth the hassle–
I love you kitties one and all!

I waged war upon those pests
using all my determination,
with no pause for food or rest–
I vanquished the abomination!



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