Annual Conference .pdf

STAND FOR SOMETHING
2014 ANNUAL CONFERENCE
Friday 18th – Sunday 20th July 2014
SUDIMA HOTEL AUCKLAND AIRPORT OAKS
18 Airport Drive, Mangere

Pack

C O N S E R V AT I V E
Waste your vote and fuck shit up

2014 ANNUAL CONFERENCE
Programme

Please look out for the Q&A box which will be strategically placed during the Feast of Souls.
Questions from this box will be ignored and subsequently placed into a cleansing fire.

FRIDAY 18TH JULY – FEAST OF SOULS
7:00pm

Summoning of our Demon Lord; Housekeeping

7:15pm

Chair: Brian Dobbs – Formal Welcome

7:20pm

Feast of Souls (Cash Bar)

8:30pm

Dessert – Tea, Coffee

8:55pm

Unholy ceremony to summon Christine Rankin

9:00pm

Guest speaker: Matthew Hooton

9:40pm

Mix and Mingle, Tortured Screams, Cash Bar

SATURDAY 19TH JULY (Morning Closed Session) SATURDAY DELEGATES ONLY
8:45am

Meet and Greet – MC Andrew Craig

9:15am

Garth McVicar (Sensible Sentencing Trust) – Assembling your sling

10:00am

Tarpaulins go down

10:45am

Morning Tea

11:05am

Ritual urination

12:00pm

Lunch

SATURDAY 19TH JULY (Afternoon Session) SATURDAY DELEGATES ONLY
1:30pm

Guest speaker: Goatse

2:00pm

Afternoon tea break

2:20pm

Bathtub scat session

3:00pm

Q&A to the panel

C O N S E R V AT I V E
Waste your vote and fuck shit up

2014 ANNUAL CONFERENCE
Programme

SATURDAY 19TH JULY (Afternoon Closed Session) AGM MEMBERS ONLY
4:30pm

AGM

5:00pm

(Or at close of AGM – break for dinner, gay men’s sauna, own cost)

SATURDAY Evening Public Session
7:00pm

Public meeting (Keys to be placed in bowl please)

7:05pm

Speaker: Colin Craig

7:40pm

Q&A to Colin

8:10pm

Orgy room opens. Nibbles/Non-alcoholic drinks provided (Cash bar available)

9:00pm

Keys drawn from bowl/Partner swapping

9:15pm

Close

SUNDAY 20TH JULY 2014 IN-HOUSE TRAINING (Sunday Delegate Ticket Holders)
9:00am

Brian Dobbs: Welcome

9:05am

Interactive Boot Camp Session on suppressing your inner homosexual

11:00pm

Morning tea

11:15am

Impromtu circle jerk

12:00pm

Lunch

1:15pm

Interactive Boot Camp Session on a woman’s place in the home (it’s the kitchen)

2:15pm

Closing ceremony and unsummoning of Christine Rankin

2:30pm

Wrap up

C O N S E R V AT I V E
Waste your vote and fuck shit up

Q&A
Here’s the place where we put all your fears to rest and hopefully answer any niggling questions. Please
ensure you bring your soul canister with you if you are intending to participate at the AGM.
Q: I am flying to the conference. Is there some kind of transport from the airport to the Sudima Auckland
Airport?
A: Yes, a summoning and teleportation circle will be made available in the men’s public toilets in Auckland
Airport. Please let us know well in advance if teleporting via the necroverse causes you nausea or
insanity.
Q: Isn’t the Feast of Souls just a waste of money?
A: Aside from the delicious souls, great entertainment and great company, Colin and Christine will be
speaking about the future of the Conservative Party and our plans for complete domination of the mortal
realm.
Q: How do I know if I should go to the Sunday Session?
A: If you’ve ever had problems suppressing your homosexuality, then this session is definitely of benefit
to you as it takes a hands on approach. You will be meeting other members who also have problems
suppressing their latent homosexual desires. This is also a policy workshop.

C O N S E R V AT I V E
Waste your vote and fuck shit up