getting rid of self sabotage .pdf
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Author: Robert Robinson
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A Foreword by Robert
I would like to address everyone who believes that our success or failures rest in the hands of
good or evil. The reason I'm addressing you all is that I coach many of you. However, good
and evil are a heart and mindset that alters the Karma in our lives. These two elements are
the only things we can override and control as far as an action. Even if your mind and heart
wish to have vengeance or any other negative action, you can change this by practicing good
habits. Success or failure is a habit. We must choose which path we desire.
- Robert Robinson
Get Rid of Self-Sabotage
It’s easy to forget just how powerful our subconscious minds can be. We are often completely
unaware of how our actions (or inactions) are affecting our lives. We may complain that things
never work out for us, we have bad luck, or we just don’t have what it takes to be successful.
What we fail to realize is that we are actually creating our own circumstances through
subconscious self-sabotage. In order to overcome self-sabotage we first have to use
conscious awareness to explore our emotions and fears, and understand how they influence
our actions. Once we have determined the cause of the destructive behavior, we can then
take steps to prevent it from happening in the future.
What’s really happening when we sabotage ourselves? Subconsciously, we may be
frightened by a particular outcome, even though we say we want it. Take, for example, losing
weight. Many overweight people have struggled for years, tried diet after diet, and still can’t
lose the weight (or keep it off). They berate themselves, push themselves harder, and try to
force the weight off. But what’s happening beneath the surface? Do they really want to lose
their excess pounds? They may say they do, but what if their layers of fat are providing a
sense of protection and security in an uncertain world?
What if they feel the need to cover up and conceal themselves? Losing weight then becomes
a threatening, frightening possibility. So they might sabotage their diet efforts in order to avoid
feeling too vulnerable and exposed. Even though they say they want to lose weight (and even
believe they do) they still might set themselves up for failure by sneaking food, skipping
exercise, and then making a promise that they’ll try harder tomorrow.
Others may be intimidated by something as simple as starting a new job. Did you know that
there are a surprisingly high number of people who don’t show up for job interviews, even for
highly-desirable positions? Let’s look at another example: Perhaps a stay-at-home-mom
decides she needs to return to the workforce to earn money for her family. What she really
wants is to stay home with her children, but she feels obligated to get a job outside the home.
So instead of applying for the perfect position, she applies for jobs that she knows she’s not
qualified for, or jobs that require hours incompatible with her family’s schedule so she has to
turn down the job if it’s offered. Subconsciously, that’s her way of ensuring she won’t have to
leave home, and at least she can say she “tried” to get a job.
Those who self-sabotage may also be afraid of what others will think of them should they
accomplish their goals. They might not believe they’re worthy of the outcome, so they act in
ways that will ensure their failure.
These destructive efforts are done subconsciously, so even the saboteurs have fooled
themselves into thinking they know what they want. If there is any uncertainty in their mind,
any doubt, any fear, they will find a way to make sure it doesn’t happen.
Perhaps this describes you? Have you sabotaged yourself in the past? Are you still doing it
now? Are you not able to move forward with your goals, no matter how hard you try?
Fortunately we CAN overcome self-sabotage. The most important step to stopping selfsabotaging behavior is to recognize that it’s happening. We must develop a conscious
awareness of our thoughts, emotions, and actions.
If you’ve been struggling with a certain goal and things just don’t seem to be working out for
you, take a look at the setbacks that were encountered and evaluate the situation. Could any
of the obstacles have been avoided by making wiser choices on your part? Are there a
significantly high number of obstacles that have arisen for this one particular goal? If so, you
may be self-sabotaging yourself.
A great way to get in touch with your subconscious mind is by spending time in quiet
meditation. Ask yourself what you’re afraid of. What fears do you have? What uncertainties?
What makes you feel uncomfortable about this goal? For what reasons would you try to hold
yourself back? Using a journal to write these questions and answers can help too, because
writing can help you to connect with the deepest part of yourself. It might take time and
practice, but exploring these possibilities can dramatically help you to get out of the selfsabotage rut.
When we finally understand that we are in control of our own success, we will be set free from
all limitations! By developing clarity and insight about the outcomes we want to create, and
the awareness for potential setbacks, we can stop the self-sabotage and focus our energies
on working toward new goals that we will fully support in every way. We will then look back
one day and see that instead of being our own worst saboteur, we have become our best