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facebookturns10 .pdf


Original filename: facebookturns10.pdf
Title: Coon Of The Week: Facebook Turns 10 - Hall of Fame - J. Cole Nation

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J. Cole Nation

J. Cole Nation

Hall of Fame

Coon Of The Week: Facebook Turns 10
Started by Cruz , Feb 04 2014 06:45 PM, 15 replies to this topic

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Cruz

Posted 04 February 2014 - 06:45 PM

#1

POPULAR

462 posts
Rae Jean, i need to
treat you better...

Facebook turns 10 today so what better way than to tell ya'll my biggest L's ever received on the
social platform. I wasn't up on Facebook when it first started but i was definitely apart of it its
prime, right after myspace slowed down and before twitter & instagram existed.
Facebook was dope for majority of reasons but primarily reconnecting with old friends was
everyone's reason to create a one. Ofcourse I loved it because of the girls so i used this great

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platform to try everything possible to get girls b.

I followed these goat 3 steps on

how to get a girl an O.G told me when i first signed up. 1. If a girl pokes you first on facebook
she's interested. 2. If the Poke war goes past 10, make sure to dive in her messages and proceed
to make the move and 3. If she likes more than 6 of your pics, your dating. (Note: These rules
only apply if she looks good.) I was a lowkey thirst bucket accepting every friend request possible
getting my friends numbers up. I received multiple pokes & likes through out this process but 1
girl stood out, we we're having a poke war that she started and she liked more than 6 pics of
mine. That's all 3 steps b, we were in a relationship without me knowing fam. I only had 1 issue
with this chick and it was because she only had 1 picture, it was mad small and blurry so i asked
her to put up more pictures. (Do realize this is before the term 'Catfish' was popular so that
wasn't in my mind b.) She said let's talk on Aim aka Aol Instant Messanger so i gave her my
screen name, she sent me a message on AIM and once i added her to my friend list her buddy
icon immediately popped up next to her name. It was a new picture of her but it was her whole
body in the picture, head to toe with concrete showing beneath her sneakers inside a buddy icon
b. Think about it for a second bruh the dimensions of a Aim Icon is 48x48 pixels

my hand

could barely fit into a icon but meanwhile she's full out comfortably chilling in the middle of a
small ass square on my aol screen throwing up the peace sign. I was lost for words b, this whole
time i was poking and messaging a fucking midget, i failed the OG who taught me the ways of
Facebook. I never blocked a bitch so quick in my life.
2 years later i was more aware of everything and a veteran to Facebook but was still out there
being thirsty posting pics just to build up my likes. I would take the dopest mirror pics ever b,
they were always angled less than 90 degrees like an acute angle. These mirror pics were
averaging 40+ likes and growing with each pic i post until one day I decided to rush and upload
a picture from Facebook Mobile, the app was so bad and confusing back in the day when the first
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iPhone dropped. I had just got a haircut so my hairline was looking fresher than Steve Harvey's

but i was going to work so i decided to use the facebook app to

upload the picture while on the bus so I opened up the app on my phone in the middle of a
crowded bus, clicked my gallery, then upload and put the phone in my pocket guessing to
myself how many likes i would have by the time i get out of work. 6 hours later, im on break so i
get my phone from the back room and seen my screen full of notifications. I'm thinking to
myself, these bitches must love my new picture so i open up my facebook app and see that my
whole phone gallery was uploaded not just the picture i took straight out the barbershop. My
body went numb like i seen a ghost b, im scrolling through the pics that got uploaded and like 8
dick pics i took to send to this girl who was sending me naked pics the night before was on my
facebook wall.

(picture is from the movie

scary movie.)
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I took so many dick pics because i was trying to get that perfect picture less than 90 degree
angle to make it look bigger so all 8 of those dick pics were horribly angled and had my shit
looking like the picture above. None of my pictures had likes, they were full of lmaooo, lol's, rotfl
and every other short code for laughing. I couldn't even delete the pics because of the piece of
shit Facebook app at the time so i wrote a status saying someone hacked my phone. I highly
doubt anyone believed that b. Once i got home, i deleted my facebook profile and i never logged
in after that. Cole World, Cruz Lost.
What's your craziest story on Facebook?

Hasman, Shiva, Kold and 15 others like this

only thing worse than death is hello.

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Who Stalks Your
Profile?
We can tell you exactly
who. Find out now, and
prepare to be shocked!

Faiz

Posted 04 February 2014 - 07:36 PM

#2

LMFAOOOOOOOOO MY NIGGGGGGGAAAAAAA !!!! Cruz da GOAT. Takes balls to make yourself
COTW lmaoo.

148 posts

- My craziest Facebook story….Bitch tried to tupac, R.Kelly, and whichever other celebs got
caught out for allegedly messin with youngins...

So i'ma be 20 this year, this happened in 2011 so I was 17. 17 with nothin but pussy on my
mental, so I'm on a fuckin spree when it comes to tryna run through chicks. So i'm chasin chicks
in my school, chicks from church, and anywhere else the female population finds themselves.
After numerous hit and misses and some close but no cigars I started learning what to do and
what not to do with these chicks. You know like using Q's and G's and spelling " Your " like " Yhur
" and shit like that. Nigga had to grow up fast…but I digress. So eventually i get into the swing
on things I'm getting chicks numbers and coin my mothafuckin thing, focusing on chicks my age
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or older at the time. I think it's easy for me to make friends because I'm really outspoken I'm not
a shy nigga so I flirt a lot ( my shorty right now hated that in the beginning of our relationship. )
But sometimes I just be being friendly to people. So this chick in church know the kinda person I
am, I flirt a lot and I'm friendly so she used to come up to me and give me hugs and stare at me
and shit it creeped me out because i knew her brothers and shit but she was just so infatuated. I
mean at 17 I was feel in myself but I ain't think I was that cute. But back to the topic. So she
sends me a FB request. I accept cause I figured she just wanted more friends. Mind you ever
since 2009 little girls haven't looked their age. I would've never added her had I known her age,
because I had a no pre-teen rule for social networks ( niggas was tryna be cool, feel me ? ). So I'm
thinking she like 16 whatever, til she messages me " How you deewin " immediately I'm like..this
bitch is buggin. So I'm like " No. " then she messages me " Whaddup doe " like 8 times, no
response. Then she's like " Hit me up ( insert number here ). " So I'm like " Little girl, you're like
12…relax plus you got older brothers just humble ya self. " Then she's like " Fuck you den, dey
don't even live widd me and dey treat me lyke shit " … I just let the convo sit in my messages.
That ain't as exciting as posting dick pics but when i went on FB twitter was kinda on the rise lol

Hasman, Cruz, ghettonintendo and 1 other like this

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Hasman

Posted 04 February 2014 - 10:18 PM

#3

cotws, the only posts you can click like before reading.
876 posts
The fresh prince, just
had dinner with
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Faiz likes this

had dinner with
Tatiana, no lie.

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Equis

Posted 04 February 2014 - 11:13 PM

#4

lol dis nigga

only thing worse than death is a regret filled coffin

544 posts
Love Yourz ...

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Shiva

Posted 05 February 2014 - 11:28 AM

Shiva: Yo Cruz, what's your facebook I'll add you to keep in touch
Cruz: Na, I don't have Facebook.
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#5

Shiva: *Why the fuck does this guy not have FB?*
*Forwards a year later*
201 posts
Don Corleone

*Now knows why

*

Cruz, CarolinaFiend, Faiz and 1 other like this

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ghettonintendo

Posted 05 February 2014 - 11:30 AM

10 posts
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#6


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