DAYMOON CRUZ QUEBRADA Multilingual Booklet (PDF)

CRUZ QUEBRADA (“Broken Cross”) is the name of
a rather bleak suburban beach near Lisbon.

CRUZ QUEBRADA

CRUZ QUEBRADA (“Gebrochenes Kreuz”) ist der
Name eines eher düsteren Strandes in einem
Lissabonner Vorort.

In 2011, people from all over the world contributed to my wife’s
surgery to save her from dying. Half a year later, she died. No
money in the world could have saved her. What could have
saved Inês was her routine colonoscopy in 2008 or so. She
skipped it out of fear.

Em 2011, pessoas de todos os cantos do mundo contribuíram
para a cirurgia que tinha por fim salvar a vida da minha mulher.
Meio ano mais tarde, ela morreu. Nenhum dinheiro do mundo
podia tê-la salvo. O que a podia ter salvo foi a colonoscopia de
rotina em 2008. Ela não a fez por ter medo.

2011 haben Menschen aus aller Welt zur Operation meiner Frau
beigetragen im Versuch, ihr Leben zu retten. Ein halbes Jahr
später starb sie. Kein Geld auf der Welt hätte sie retten können.
Was Inês hätte retten können, war ihre routinemäßige
Darmspiegelung 2008. Sie machte sie aus Angst nicht.

The first seven songs on this album (“Out”) were written shortly
before and in the months following Inês’s death. I hadn’t meant to
release them or even record them professionally. Until I
understood in 2014 that I could give back the help we’d been
given by telling the world our story, and telling the world that this
fatal disease can be prevented.

Os primeiros sete temas neste álbum (“Out”) foram escritos
pouco antes e nos meses após a morte da Inês. Não tinha
previsto lançá-los nem, de facto, gravá-los de forma profissional.
Mas foi em 2014 que percebi que podia retribuir toda a ajuda que
recebêramos contando a nossa história ao mundo, e contando
ao mundo que esta doença pode ser prevenida.

The second half of the album (“In”) was written between 2014
and 2015, and recounts my way into Life 2.0 with my new family
and Manuela, who stood by me relentlessly throughout my
sorrow – and yes – kept me from taking my own life at the time.
She allowed my daughter and me not to forget our past and to
preserve our lives as a Unity.

A segunda metade do álbum (“In”) foi escrita entre 2014 e 2015,
e relata o meu percurso até à Vida 2.0 com a minha nova família
e Manuela, que permaneceu ao meu lado, incansavelmente, na
minha dor - e sim, foi ela que não me deixou desistir de viver na
altura e permitiu que eu e a minha filha não esquecêssemos o
nosso passado.

Die ersten sieben Lieder auf diesem Lieder auf diesem Album
(“Out”) habe ich kurz vor und in den Monaten nach Inês’s Tod
geschrieben. Ich hatte nicht vor, sie zu veröffentlichen,
geschweige denn sie professionell aufzunehmen. 2014 verstand
ich dann aber, daß ich zurück geben konnte, was uns gegeben
worden war, indem ich der Welt unsere Geschichte erzähle, und
der Welt weitergebe, daß dieser tödlichen Krankheit vorgebeugt
werden kann .

The music on this album is intended to be listened to. It won’t
work as background music. It won’t work as party music. It won’t
work if listened to in small bits. It might work if you dedicate 70
undisturbed minutes to this collection of songs that drained me
mentally and physically.

A música neste álbum deve ser ouvida. Não funcionará como
música de fundo. Não funcionará como música para festas. Não
funcionará se for ouvida aos bocados. Poderá funcionar se
dedicar 70 minutos sem interrupção a esta coleção de músicas,
que me esgotaram física e mentalmente.

All my proceeds of this album go to Europacolon or their partner
association in the country where the album is purchased. Thank
for helping colon cancer patients in your country and other
countries, and for helping to alert people that colon cancer can be
prevented.

Todos os meus lucros deste álbum revertem para a Europacolon
ou a sua associação parceira no país em que o álbum for
adquirido. Obrigado por ajudar doentes com cancro do cólon no
seu país e noutros países, e por ajudar a alertar que existe
prevenção para o cancro do cólon.

Die zweite Hälfte des Albums (“In”) entstand 2014-2015 und
beschreibt meinen Weg ins Leben 2.0 mit meiner neuen Familie
und Manuela, die kompromisslos an meiner Seite durch den
Schmerz gestanden hat und dafür verantwortlich ist, daß ich noch
lebe, indem sie mir es gestattete, nicht zu vergessen und mein
eigenes und das Leben meiner Tochter in seiner Ganzheit zu
belassen.
Der Musik auf diesem Album muß zugehört werden. Sie
funktioniert nicht als Musik im Hintergrund. Sie funktioniert nicht
als Party-Musik. Sie funktioniert nicht, wenn man sie
stückchenweise hört. Sie kann dann funktionieren, wenn dieser
Sammlung von Liedern, die mich körperlich und seelisch
erschöpft haben, 70 ungestörte Minuten widmet.
Alle meine Einkünfte dieses Albums gehen an Europacolon bzw.
an die entsprechenden Partner in den Länder, in denen die CD
gekauft wird. Danke für Ihre Hilfe an Darmkrebskrane in Ihrem
Land und anderen Ländern. Danke auch für Ihre Hilfe, Menschen
darauf hinzuweisen, daß Vorsorge der einzige Schutz ist.

My deepest gratitude to all those who helped Inês in late 2011 and gave me back my faith in humanity, especially Roine Stolt (The Flower Kings), Andy Tillison (The Tangent), my dearest friend Thomas Nehring,
Mário Pinheiro (Ribafreixo), and so many others. The album wouldn’t exist without the excellent musicians who performed on it, and each one of them voluntarily so, without any pay at all. I owe my Life 2.0 to those
who stood by me and propelled me out of the darkness: my daughter Joana, my driving teacher Jorge, Annika Dacke, Thomas Olsson, and a handful of other good people, but also to my lovely wife Manuela who
backed me up through the entire taxing process of creating this album. And of course I must thank André Marques for being there for me at all times, and for sacrificing an entire year of his life for this cause to produce
and perform this album. My thanks also to our singer Bruno Evangelista, who made equally sure that I wouldn’t put this in a drawer and forget about it. Many thanks also to our brave beta testers Roland Heil, Paula
Ferreira (who has been there) and Hélio Pinto for their valuable input! Finally yet importantly, I thank Vítor Neves and Europacolon for being there for those who need them, and for backing us! I wish I had known
about you back in the darkest hours. Or before that, for Inês would surely have done her colonoscopy.

Fred Lessing
Sintra, June 2015

PART 1: “Out”
1. CRUZ QUEBRADA
Fred: vocals, electric guitar, field recordings
André: keyboards, field recordings
Paulo Chagas: wind instruments
Sounds recorded at Cruz Quebrada beach (including passing trains), on the ferryboat crossing the Tagus river (deep rumble of engines),
and in Sintra during a thunder storm. People sounds recorded at Mourisca Bar with Mário Ferreira’s kind permission.

My emotions on the morning I arrived at hospital and was told my wife had died during the night.
O que senti na manhã em que cheguei ao Hospital Amadora-Sintra e me foi dito que a minha mulher morrera durante a noite.
Meine Gefühle an dem Morgen, an dem ich im Krankenhaus ankam, und mir wurde gesagt, daß meine Frau nachts gestorben war.

Stop. STOP!

Parem. PAREM!

Stopp. STOPP!

Stop the world!
The cross is broken

Parem o mundo!
A cruz está quebrada

Haltet die Welt an!
Das Kreuz ist gebrochen

Stop the world!

Parem o mundo!

Haltet die Welt an!

The woman is dead

A mulher morreu

Die Frau ist tot

2. FISH DISSECTED
Bruno: lead vocals
Fred: backing vocals, electric and acoustic guitar, bass guitar, vocals, flute, angklung, African xylophone
André: backing vocals, keyboards, piano, electric, acoustic and bass guitars, metallophone, drums, percussion
Adriano: clarinet
Paulo Chagas: woodwinds & reeds
Lost. Confused. Trying to move at all.
Perdido. Confuso. Tentativa de me movimentar de alguma forma.
Verloren. Verwirrt. Versuch, mich überhaupt irgendwie zu bewegen

Ephemeral flowers and root words. Floating nowhere, where I wish I
were for moments just

Flores efémeras e palavras-raiz. Flutuando para nenhures,
Onde eu gostaria de estar apenas durante instantes

Vergängliche Blumen und Stammwörter. Fließen nach irgendwo,
Wo ich für Augenblicke zu sein mir wünschte

The wind turned south in the night sky, set the dormant town adrift on a O vento virou para sul no céu noturno,
waft of ancient air
Pondo à deriva a vila adormecida numa rajada de ar antigo

Der Wind schlug im Nachthimmel um nach Süden,
Trieb die schlafende Stadt auf einem Schwall uralter Luft

In restless dreams of Egypt, nothing but the circle of my heart
enclosed, in the warm womb of my mouth

Em sonhos irrequietos do Egito, circunscrito nada senão o círculo
Do meu coração, no útero quente da minha boca

Ruhelose Träume von Ägypten umkapseln nichts als den Kreis
Meines Herzens im warmen Schoß meines Mundes

The tiny summer of the lamp – in the dark blue of the room,
On the warm side of the window – it came as no surprise

O verão quente do candeeiro – na escuridão azul do quarto,
Do lado quente da janela – não foi surpresa

Der winzige Sommer der Lampe – im dunklen Blau des Zimmers,
Auf der warmen Seite des Fenster war es keine Überraschung

When a fish swam by to materialise
The dampness of my woollen trousers,
My grey wet hair, my lead-clad eyes.

Quando um peixe passou a nadar para materializar
A humidade das minhas calças de lã,
Do meu cabelo, dos meus olhos revestidos de chumbo.
À espera que, um dia, o mar, o mar recue,
Devolvendo-nos à luz do dia, toda a urgência sumiu

Als ein Fisch vorbeischwamm, um die Klammheit meiner
Wollhose zu materialiseren
Meiner Haare, meiner bleitragenden Augen.

Waiting out until one day, the sea, the sea recedes,
Return us to the light of day, all urgency is gone

Abwarten, bis das Meer, das Meer sich eines Tages zurückzieht,
Uns dem Tageslicht zurückgibt, alle Dringlichkeit vergangen

Because time’s become finite, every yard’s short
By twenty-five hours it’s short
Now’s the one and only word … I can handle

Porque o tempo passou a ser finito, e a cada metro
Faltam 25 horas,
Agora é a única palavra com que sei lidar

Blind stumble, hooks of berries in the corner bruises of the lips
As the sky weeps brutal purple, tar on scorching pores.

Tropeços cegos, ganchos de bagas nos cantos feridos da boca
Enquanto o céu chora uma violenta cor púrpura,
Derramando alcatrão nos poros escaldados.

Stumble blind, and onward we plunge
On with the globe,

Tropeços cegos, e seguimos caindo avante
Ao passo do globo,

Blind stolpernd und vorwärts stürzen wir
Immer weiter mit der Erdkugel,

Pinned painfully into the uncaring
Geography of life
As time hurts us to the bone
As time hurts us to the bone
Hurts us to the bone...

Afixados dolorosamente na geografia
Indiferente da vida
Enquanto o tempo nos fere até aos ossos
Enquanto o tempo nos fere até aos ossos
Fere até aos ossos...

Schmerzvoll auf die lieblose Geographie des
Lebens gestochen
Und die Zeit schmerzt uns bis zum Knochen
Und die Zeit schmerzt uns bis zum Knochen
Schmerzt uns bis zum Knochen...

Denn die Zeit ist nun begrenzt, jeder Meter zu kurz
Um 25 Stunden zu kurz
„Jetzt“ ist das einzige Wort … mit dem ich klarkomme
Blindes Stolpern, die Widerhaken von Beeren
In den Winkelprellungen der Lippen, während der Himmel grausames
Violett erweint, Teer auf verbrühende Poren vergießt.

3. WHERE IT HURTS MOST
Fred: keyboards, vocals, acoustic and electric guitar, bass guitar, flute, metallophone
André: keyboards, drums, percussion
Nuno Flores: violin, viola
Luca Calabrese: trumpet

In the ultimate silence of the gathering dark
I moulded my words and rephrased the past
Godlike, my love, the world you had shaped
We were all at your feet, we were all your feat

No silêncio derradeiro da escuridão crescente
Moldei as minhas palavras e reformulei o meu passado
Quase uma deusa, meu amor, o mundo que moldaste
E nós todos a teus pés, nós todos aquilo que criaste

In der endgültigen Stille der herankommenden Dunkelheit
Formte ich meine Worte und formulierte die Vergangenheit um
Wie Gott, meine Liebe, hattest du die Welt gestaltet
Wir alle zu deinen Füßen, wir alle deine Tat

You resolved us all, absolved our tears
You were the arrow and the anvil of fire pure
You moulded the world for us alone
Your light we absorbed and drank you dry like a stone

Resolveste-nos, absolveste as nossas lágrimas
Foste seta e bigorna de chama pura
Moldaste o mundo, para nós e apenas para nós , a tua luz
absorvemos,
E bebemos de ti até secares como uma pedra

Du klärtest uns alle, entbandest unsere Tränen
Du warst der Pfeil und der Amboss aus reinem Feuer
Du formtest die Welt nur für uns
Dein Licht absorbierten wir und tranken dich trocken wie Stein

A thirst-ridden whirlwind of beggars we were
But now our house has grown still
Vast empty spaces that nothing can fill
You withered away into a speck of pain
The beggars vanished as if they’d never been
And the silence grows darker till my ears ring
I cupped my hands around your flame that never needed words
For a goddess sheds light
The world retreats, I fight the dark
Fill the stillness, your altar becomes the world
For the world became void when you left,
And no angels will save me
So I rise and fight

Éramos um turbilhão de mendigos sedentos
Mas agora a nossa casa calou-se
Espaços vazios e vastos que nada consegue preencher
Mirraste até ficares uma partícula de dor
Os mendigos desapareceram como se nunca tivessem existido
E o silêncio cresceu até os meus ouvidos retumbarem
Cerrei as mãos em torno da tua chama, que nunca precisou
De palavras, porque uma deusa... derrama luz
O mundo retrai-se, combato o negrume
Para preencher o silêncio - o teu altar torna-se o mundo
Porque o mundo se transformou em nada quando partiste,
E não existem anjos que me possam salvar
Por isso levanto-me e luto

Ein durstgetriebener Wirbelsturm aus Bettlern waren wir
Nun aber ist unser Haus still geworden
Enorme leere Räume, die nichts füllen kann
Du schrumpftest zu einem Punkt aus Schmerz
Die Bettler verschwunden, als wären sie nie gewesen
Und die Stille wird dunkler, bis es in meinen Ohren rauscht
Ich legte meine Hände um deine Flamme, die nie Worte brauchte
Denn eine Göttin vergießt Licht
Die Welt zieht sich zurück, ich kämpfe gegen die Dunkelheit
Fülle die Stille, dein Altar wird die Welt
Denn die Welt wurde nichtig, als du sie verließt
And keine Engel werden mich retten
Und so erhebe ich mich und kämpfe

4. SHIPWRECK

Cruz Quebrada

Bruno: lead vocals
Fred: backing vocals, acoustic and electric guitar, bass guitar, flute
André: lead vocals (bogus 80’s section), backing vocals keyboards, ebow, 12-string acoustic guitar, acoustic and electronic drums, metallophone, percussion

Over time, we learn to throw everything away and start from scratch. Written over a stretch of ever so slightly better days. Yes, the ending is ironic.
Ao longo do tempo aprendemos a deitar fora tudo e recomeçar do nada. Escrito durante alguns dias ligeiramente menos maus. E sim, o final é irónico.
Wir lernen nach und nach, alles fort zu werfen und völlig neu zu beginnen. Über einige etwas besserer Tage hinweg geschrieben. Doch, das Ende ist ironisch.

After the Titanic sank, I swam for weeks on end
Against the ice-cold sea

Depois do Titanic se afundar, nadei durante semanas
Contra o mar gelado

Nachdem die Titanic sank, schwamm ich endlose Wochen
Gegen das eiskalte Meer

Six weeks in the sea, was battered at last
Against a barren rock,

Após seis semanas no mar, fui atirado por fim
Contra um rochedo ermo,

Nach sechs Wochen im Meer, wurde ich endlich gegen
Einen kahlen Felsen gepeitscht

So here I squat now, growing a beard
Of icicles in the storm

E aqui estou eu, acocorado, deixando crescer a barba
De estalactites de gelo na tempestade

Und so hocke ich hier jetzt, laß den Bart wachsen
Aus Eiszapfen im Sturm

That howls across the barren islet,
And labour to obliterate...

Que uiva sobre o ilhéu ermo,
E esforço-me para obliterar...

Der über die kahle Insel heult,
Und plage mich,dies auszulöschen:

Three kinds of grief: for those who have drowned
And those who live on, and for myself.

Os três tipos de luto: por aqueles que se afogaram,
Por aqueles que continuam vivos. E por mim.

Die drei Arten von Trauer: für die, die ertrunken sind,
Und die, die weiterleben. Und für mich selbst.

While far behind me,
Washed up on the shoreline,
All that I once loved is decaying now,
To be discarded for good:

Enquanto, atrás de mim,
Foi de arrasto até à costa
Tudo que em tempos amava e que agora apodrece,
À espera de ser descartado de uma vez por todas:

Während weit hinter mir,
Angespült an der Strandlinie,
Alles, was ich je liebte, nun verrottet,
Darauf wartet, endgültig verworfen zu werden:

My case with the music in it
Book with the words in it
My trunk with the recipes
My soul with all that I used to feel

A minha mala com a música
O meu livro com as palavras
O meu baú com as receitas
A minha alma com tudo o que, em tempos, sentia

Mein Koffer mit der Musik darin
Mein Buch mit den Worten darin
Meine Truhe mit den Rezepten darin
Meine Seele mit Allem, was ich mal gefühlt habe

So I start anew now in the frozen wasteland
For time is seemingly endless

E assim começo tudo de novo nas terras ermas geladas
Porque o tempo parece não ter fim

Und so beginne ich jetzt aufs Neue im gefrorenen Ödland,
Denn die Zeit ist anscheinend endlos

Spit in your palms and rub your hands
There’s work to be done, old man!

Cospe nas palmas, esfrega as mãos
Há trabalho a fazer, velhote!

Spuck in die Hände, reibe die Hände
Es ist noch viel zu tun, alter Mann!

5. WHALEBONE
Fred: lead vocals, electric and acoustic guitar, keyboards, bass guitar, vocals, flute
André: keyboards, backing vocals, metallophone, drums, percussion
Adriano: clarinet
Paulo Chagas: woodwinds & reeds in introduction

Written in the blackest days of December six weeks before Inês died. Stephen is our friend Stephen Brody, whose paintings adorn many a wall in our house; Inês’s painting in the picture above is his..
Escrito nos dias mais negros de dezembro, seis semanas antes da morte. Stephen é o nosso amigo Stephen Brody. O retrato da Inês no fotografia é dele).
Geschrieben in den dunkelsten Dezembertagen, sechs Wochen vor Ines’s Tod. Stephen ist unser Freund Stephen Brody, Inês’s Portrait im Foto hat er gemalt

I look up from my Iris Murdoch novel into the fire-lit gloom
The photographs on the piano, the darkness of the room
The whalebone on the mantelpiece that we found back in 1985
On a grey beach in late December when the world belonged to me
and you

Ergo o olhar da Iris Murdoch para a escuridão iluminada pelo lume,
as fotografias no piano, a obscuridade da sala
O osso de baleia na cornija da chaminé, que encontrámos em 1985
Numa praia cinzenta ao terminar dezembro, quando o mundo era
meu e teu

Ich blicke von meinem Iris Murdoch-Roman auf in das
flammenbeleuchtete Dunkel
Die Fotos auf dem Klavier, die Dunkelheit des Zimmers
Der Walfischknochen auf dem Kaminsims, den wir an einem grauen
Strand im Spätdezember 1985 gefunden hatten, als die Welt mir und
dir gehörte

I take stock of all we’ve gathered
Each piece history while my heart slows down

Faço o inventário de tudo que colecionámos
Cada peça é História, enquanto o meu coração abranda

Ich nehme Bestand all dessen auf, was wir angesammelt haben
Jedes Stück ist Geschichte, während mein Herz langsamer wird

All is said and all is done, and I am weary to the bone
So the suns sets on a long, long life

Está tudo dito e feito, e eu estou cansado até ao osso
E assim o sol se põe sobre uma vida longa, tão longa

Alles ist gesagt und alles ist getan, und ich bin ermüdet bis auf die
Knochen, und so geht die Sonne eines langen, langen Lebens unter

The rain outside howls around the house you built with your own
hands
At the core of the world, the soothing sound of firewood

A chuva lá fora uiva em redor da casa que construíste com as tuas
próprias mãos
No núcleo do mundo o som reconfortante da lenha

Der Regen draußen heult um das Haus, das du mit deinen Händen
erbaut hast
Im Kern der Welt der beruhigende Klang von Kaminholz

The Händel scores I still can’t play
The painting gear you’ve never used
A cooking book that’s still unopened,
Along with dramas from ancient Greece

As pautas de Händel que ainda não sei tocar,
Os pincéis e as tintas que nunca usaste,
Um livro de cozinha que ainda está por abrir,
Juntamente com dramas da Grécia antiga

Die Händel-Stücke, die ich immer noch nicht spielen kann, die Pinsel
und die Leinwand, die du nie benutzt hast
Ein ungeöffnetes Kochbuch zusammen mit klassischen, griechischen
Dramen

Stephen’s paintings on our walls
Vanitas of aspirations come undone

Os quadros de Stephen nas nossas paredes
Vanitas de aspirações desfeitas

Stephens Gemälde an unseren Wänden
Eine Vanitas zerstörter Hoffnungen

All is said and all is done, and I am weary to the bone
So the suns sets on a long, long life

Está tudo dito e feito, e eu estou cansado até ao osso
E assim o sol se põe sobre uma vida longa, tão longa

Alles ist gesagt und alles ist getan, und ich bin ermüdet bis auf die
Knochen, und so geht die Sonne eines langen, langen Lebens unter

Imagine, if you will, a horror movie of the truly terrifying sort.
Something evil is about to happen, and eventually it does. But your
fear does not subside, for you're not even half-way through the
movie, and each new wave of sheer panic is going to be worse.
Now stretch this movie over months and years. Time is not a healer;
it grates the core of your soul down to a hollow depression that
darkens, deepens you forever.

Imaginem, digamos, um filme de terror completamente assustador.,
algo mau vai acontecer, e realmente acontece. Mas os teu medo não
diminui porque ainda nem chegaste a metade do filme, e cada nova
onda de pânico puro será pior. E agora estica esse filme ao longo de
meses e anos. O tempo não cura; corrói o cerne da nossa alma até
que se transforma numa depressão oca que nos escurece, nos torna
mais profundos para sempre.

Stellt euch einen wirklich erschreckenden Horrorfilm vor. Etwas
Böses wird geschehen. und dann geschieht es. Aber eure Angst
bleibt, denn ihr seid gerade erst Mal bei der Hälfte des Films
angekommen, und jede neue Wille schierer Panik wird schlimmer
werden. Streckt diesen Film nun über Monate und Jahre hinweg. Die
Zeit heilt nichts; sie zersetzt den Kern unserer Seele zu einer hohlen
Vertiefung, die uns für immer verdunkelt, vertieft.

All is said and all is done, and I am weary to the bone
And the suns sets on a long, long life
All is said and all is done, and I am weary to the bone
And the suns sets on a long, long life

Está tudo dito e feito, e eu estou cansado até ao osso
E assim o sol se põe sobre uma vida longa, tão longa
Está tudo dito e feito, e eu estou cansado até ao osso
E assim o sol se põe sobre uma vida longa, tão longa

Alles ist gesagt und alles ist getan, und ich bin ermüdet bis auf die
Knochen, und so geht die Sonne eines langen, langen Lebens unter