Ringling Bros. RNC Spoof Press Release .pdf

SPOOF PRESS RELEASE
OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE
DATED JULY 22ND, 2016

— — FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE — —
FELD ENTERTAINMENT, INCORPORATED
RINGLING BROS. AND BARNUM & BAILEY CIRCUS
Ellenton, Florida — As we are sure most of the nation is aware of, Cleveland was
host to the 2016 Republican National Convention. We applaud the City of
Cleveland for its stellar work in managing such a large and important event. What
caught our attention, however, was the mastery of the circus art that unfolded at
the Convention.
Since 1919, Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus has brought this nation
some of the most well-orchestrated and meticulous circus performances to both
American children and adults alike. To this end, we have brought numerous
individuals to our team who have played a role in improving and enhancing the
show experience.
Over the past week in Cleveland, the presumptive Republican nominee and the
RNC as a whole has shown us that we need to improve our performances. In
response to this, we are calling on the Republican Establishment to help us learn
how we can step up our game.
There have been a number of specific people we have asked to assist us to this
end. They include current RNC chair Reince Priebus, former New York mayor
Rudolph Giuliani, Senator Ted Cruz, and Mrs. Melania Trump. We have also
extended a warm welcome to Donald Trump, but have received no response as
of yet.
"One of the post important things in business is realizing you always have room
for improvement," said Feld Entertainment CEO Kenneth Feld at today's press
conference. "We constantly strive to improve the quality of the Ringling Bros.
circus. The opportunity for inviting numerous new faces to our team has arisen,
so we will make the most profound effort possible to bring them on board."
The RNC has not commented on our invitations to several members.

SPOOF PRESS RELEASE